Internet users are divided on whether or not a woman was disrespectful to her family for leaving a Thanksgiving celebration abruptly due to the presence of her sister’s dog.
Reddit user One_Procedure8627 posted a note in the subreddit “Am I the A*****e” on Friday, Nov. 25, asking others for their opinions about her handling of the situation.
The woman — in a post titled “AITA for going home because of my [sister’s] dog being at Thanksgiving” — explained that she does not like dogs in general, and that her 29-year-old sister “has a dog that she says her world revolves around.”
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The dog “sheds a lot,” the original poster wrote, also noting that she’d previously found dog hair in dishes that her sister prepared.
“I don’t eat food at/from my sister’s house,” she said in her post. “I’ve found dog hair in her cooking before, so I gently pass on her dishes. Privately I have told my mom that I don’t like her dog around food and I won’t eat my sister’s dishes.”
Thanksgiving dinner was to be held at her parents’ house, the poster explained, saying that when she arrived, she found her sister helping to prepare the meal.
“Next thing I know the dog is trotting through the kitchen,” the poster said. “This whole situation was too much, and I told them I wouldn’t be eating this food,” she wrote.
“You’re approaching this as if your stance is common and therefore your family was being unreasonable.”
“They ask why, I tell them why,” the poster continued. “My sister says I’m blowing things out of proportion. Mentions lots of people eat food prepared [while] dogs are nearby. I tell her I’m not one of those people.”
She left the house at that point, she said — although she did leave the pies she brought for the meal, she noted.
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Others in the family did not receive her decision well, she wrote. “When dinner was supposed to happen, my phone was blowing up and I was told I should have just dealt with it by multiple family members. So AITA?”
On the AITA subreddit, Reddit users can reply to posts saying that the poster is “NTA” (“Not the A*****e), “YTA” (“You’re the A*****e”), “NAH” (“No A*****e Here”) or “ESH” (“Everyone Sucks Here”). Users can “upvote” responses they think are helpful and “downvote” ones that are not.
Replies to the original poster’s question were all over the map.
The top upvoted response came from user genxerbear, who said that One_Procedure8627 was not in the wrong for leaving.
“NTA, sounds like your sister has a messy house and the dog is not properly groomed either,” the user wrote. “I totally get it, and you shouldn’t have to put up with the dog mess.”
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Another chimed in, empathizing with both the poster and the family, as this person’s own dog is apparently constantly shedding despite proper grooming.
“For me, I will pick NAH since I can understand both sides. She is in the right to refuse to eat there,” wrote IIBuffaloII.
“Your family relationships will do better if you own up to having an unusual and very strong phobia against eating around pets.”
The second highest upvoted post, however, took a different approach to the situation.
“YTA but only for your failure to communicate,” wrote Reddit user capmanor1755.
“You’re approaching this as if your stance is common and therefore your family was being unreasonable,” wrote capmanor1755.
“There are 69 million dog owners and 45 million cat owners in the U.S., most all of whom eat food prepared around pets,” this person continued.
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“Most people would refuse to eat food in a home where pets were licking off the dishes, but most people would not refuse to eat food in a home where a dog was present.”
While One_Procedure8627 has a “right to have an atypical stance on eating around dogs,” she should be proactive in making her stance known to others, continued Capmanor1755.
“To avoid being an a******e, you need to explain the extent of your aversion and ask for their support,” the person continued.
This commenter also suggested that One_Procedure8627 use terms like “phobia” to better characterize her displeasure around eating in the presence of dogs and other animals.
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“Your family relationships will do better if you own up to having an unusual and very strong phobia against eating around pets,” wrote capmanor1755.
“Ask your mom and sister if they are open to accommodating you rather than suggesting that they’re unhygienic beasts, and you’ll be more likely to preserve your family relationships.”
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Another top comment was more succinct in its view of the story.
“YTA,” wrote Reddit user SoloPiName. “I am absolutely not a dog fan but unless they were wiping their utensils on his butt, I think you’re being pretty dramatic.”